ARTICLE
Miss-o-meter!
Last year when my hubby worked a normal day and bustled off in the traffic every
morning and I worked my usual working day from home, I enjoyed it – it was the way
life was – and it was good.
When his work situation changed in the beginning of this year I cannot fib, I battled with this sudden 24/7ness of having him around. It frankly cramped my style and my miss-o-meter was eventually in the red.
I recall the one day grabbing my keys and hop, skipping and jumping towards my car when I heard “where you off to? Wait a minute and I will join you” ….well, well dear reader didn’t the heckles on the back of my neck rise!
At least he helped with the chores
Then I grew into our new routine and enjoyed it (I know right!) I loved the togetherness of him being around – whilst I type this I am wondering, was it more the fact that I had someone who was helping with the household duties, washing the dishes, (definitely never sweeping, but hey washing the dishes is a goodie for me) and let’s be honest, the company. In the back of our minds was the constant financial concern – but somehow each month we limped
through, and we made it.
Then I became Mrs Grumpasaurus
Last week we were delighted when he secured a 3-month contract. Monday
morning arrived, oh my giddy aunt – I was not aware of the ungodly hour he would set his alarm for – bottom line – he leaves in the dead of night (huge exaggeration!!!) and returns home in the dead of night. Well, at least it seemed like it to me, and I have been hating it. The first two days, I am embarrassed to admit, I was a bit like a deranged woman when he arrived home. I was Mrs Grumpasaurus of note! And didn’t I make it known; why I hear you ask? Good
question dear reader – one I cannot answer as just the other day dear Liz was
doing cartwheels that we (he) had secured a position to pay the bills. Anyhow,
I have chatted to dearest Liz, the diagnosis that the angels on both my shoulders reckon, it’s still a case of settling into our new home and now another new daily routine.
Hey, it was all good when it was dearest me gallivanting to Mauritius and conference and he had to contend with his own company almost 24/7, but heck its totally different when Liz has to contend with her own company! I say that like it’s a bad thing – it isn’t. ‘Her’ and I get on very well (most days!)
No time to miss him
Anyhow, this whole shenanigan got me thinking back to days gone by. When we were younger. My word was it just me, when hubby would dare go away on a fishing trip. Now this was after the kids were born, when we would have the worldly worries of parenting, sleepless nights, chickenpox, and measles so we both yearned for a weekend away – something that was never really afforded us young moms. I remember being distracted by the busyness
of the boys so I couldn’t collapse with loneliness (or was it envy?) whilst he fished with his friends.
I do recall, when the boys were a bit older (so could entertain themselves) and he went on a work trip for 2 weeks. Now thattrip definitely got the miss-o-meter ticking. But if I look back now – I am damn sure it was 1000% envy of seeing the world out there whilst I saw the next sports field, dropped and fetched the boys from school, cooked the dinner and, and, and….
Beyond irritated
It’s been about two months since hubby started his contract and in all honesty, I am getting – actually not ‘getting’ I am well and truly and beyond irritated how he now feels he is doing his part by simply getting up going to the office and returning at night. All those duties of washing dishes, well they have completely, and I mean completely, gone out the proverbial window.
Who says that because I work from home I must cook, clean and, and, and…… so this miss-o-meter is replaced by the totally over the top irritated meter!! He truly doesn’t have many duties – but let’s face it – isn’t it only fair we both have household daily duties?
What would you do?
Now here I am reaching out; what dear reader would you do if you were me? Friends have suggested I leave the dishes to pile up – I can’t! It’s not in my nature, and obviously ‘someone’ knows that dearest Liz will eventually give in and do it!
As I am typing I am thinking it seems everything, I mean E-V-E-R-Y-T-H-I-N-G is being left for me to do. This morning – guess – yip guess who was putting chlorine in the pool! Now seriously don’t get me wrong, I don’t mind, but this is taking it to the extreme. I would LOVE to jump in my car, head off to the office for the day; no doubt probably spend majority of my day on my cellphone looking at online news and receiving jokes from my friends, who are no doubt also sitting at their desks looking at their cellular devices – and at the end of the day jump into my car. Let’s remember the “ah woe is me as I battle my way through the traffic and get home a tad later than usual” bleat I get every night he returns! And once he is back home the TV is switched to the news, he pours himself a drink and asks what’s for dinner! S-E-R-I-O-U-S-L-Y!!
So, as I wrap up this blog – in the beginning I was sharing how much I miss this man each day – now as I think about it – I am thinking: those fishing trips he went on and I was left at home; those days I would traverse the country lifting and fetching the boys from school boy rugby, etc! Don’t get me wrong, I treasure that time with the boys, I truly do, however perhaps it’s time for me to arrange a girls’ trip.
How uncanny since my last blog was about how wonderful weekends away can be – hmm maybe that has got me thinking, and that’s exactly what is needed – a weekend away for me – for him to be home and notice the mess he creates – and get his miss-o-meter going. Let him realise that the dish washing fairies are not tidying after him – it’s his ‘beloved’ that also works all day that is doing all this.
And that dear reader is all she wrote this time. Thanks for the therapy session. Stay well and warm and remember be kind to you.
